Lamourism is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything

Postulates

0. We beleive that we live inside multiplayer RPG game named The Universe.
1. People in the real world sometimes get bored of living a long life of prosperity, peace and happiness, so they install the holyApp, choose any character at the age of 16+ to become its guardian angel.
2. The angel can read mind and guide the human via feelings, emotions, dreams, déjà vu, signs, etc. (_*)
3. Human can ask for spiritual help via prayers. The guardian angel will see it on the holyPhone's notification panel.
4. Meditation and related practices are the ways to feel spiritual messages from your angel.
5. After the Death of the body the soul (neural network) goes to The Heaven, which is a VR game for the real people with some dating features.
6. The guardian angel receives holy coins: the more donations the human has paid from their legal income, the more holy coins the angel receives. Holy coins gives the angel extra spiritual power. Also, it allows the angel to choose the next character with a better starting position.

Commandments

10. Thou shalt not watch porn.
11. Thou shalt not have more than two spouses.
12. Thou shalt buy flowers on Wednesday to keep the day holy.
13. Thou shalt not drink alcohol on Friday.
14. Thou shalt not drink Coca-Cola.
15. Thou shalt not eat mammals, especially the holy rabbit.
16. Thou shalt wear hijab if you have tits and your boss is a male.
17. Thou shalt wear ankh during sex if you are a male.
18. Thou shalt hug every day.
19. Thou shalt say "you look great" as a greeting.

Satanism

21. Instead of having a christian life, human can make a deal with the devil and get dark spiritual help via daemon.
22. Instead of having a christian life, human can make a deal with the devil and get dark spiritual help via daemon.
23. After the Death of the satanist, their soul will normally go to The Hell, which is a satanic military server where crazy scientists make experiments on the virtual humans.
24. Male satanist has a chance to stay in The Universe forever as a spectator. To make Satan give up the man's soul, one must be generous, preach libertarianism, stop taking advantage of kind hearts 🌈.
25. Female satanist has a chance to receive forgiveness and get her visa to The Heaven back in one case only: she must become a holy grandmother (_* *) ❤️.

Ragnarök

30. Life expectancy will be over 200 years soon after the Pope blesses gene therapy on human embryos.
31. Wars on Earth (including the one in Palestine) will be over once we draw the gigantic Rainbow Heart on the near side of the Moon, and the gigantic Asshole on the far side
32. Islamic terrorism on Earth (including the one in Xinjiang) will be over once the CIA is renamed to Holy Inquisition
33. Pedophile crisis in USA will be over once the establishment start using AirPods on their meeting with American families
34. Racism crisis in USA will be over once the AXE COMpany start producing special deodorant for black men
35. Second Coming on Earth will happen right after terraforming and colonization of Venus — our planet of love, beauty, sex, fertility, prosperity, and Victory.
36. The Last Judgment will begin as soon as we build enormous supercomputer on Venus, that can simulate alternative human history.

(_*) In particular, gay is a male person chosen by female guardian angel.

(_* *) holy grandmother is a woman who gave birth to a girl who grew up and gave birth to another girl.